Welcome To The Vomitorium

I’m going to make this short.

Yesterday upon my arrival @ the Library I was greeted by a HUGE puddle of vomit directly in front of the staff entrance which I had to step over in order to enter the building to start my day… Splendid! Although beer cans, used condoms, urine and vomit are usually never far from point blank range, never before have I had to step over one to start my day. Swell.

I’m also going to include in this post, Tony, as he is like peas and carrots to vomit. Every summer we get some hard luck high school student to put to work, to show s/he what it’s like to have a job. Tony is the most apathetic, un-motivated person I have EVER met! Every department head get’s him for an hour once day a week. When he is at Reference the Reference Librarian has him cutting coupons to distribute to the public for 20 minutes however 15 minutes of the time he spends staring at the walls. When it’s time to switch to some other task, Tony says, “I don’t want to.”

Well you know what Tony, I don’t want to babysit your fussy teen ass either but this is work, and the way work works is that you often times have to do stuff that you don’t want to do. I do it in order to pay my mortgage and to have some kind of cushion when I can no longer work and am forced to retire… As the Social Security I’ve been paying into is depleted and I only get a check from them each month that affords me one grande latte from Starbucks in 2050.

Tony makes me want to vomit. The Assistant Director had him sweeping the sidewalk in from of the building on what was an absolutely beautiful day 75ish with low humidity and he was very displeased. I was like, “I’ll take the broom and you can send him up to Reference!” That idea was nixed almost immediately after the laughing subsided… The AD thought that he needed some movement to satisfy him instead of the sessile activity he was given. Sadly Tony’s only ambition in life is sitting on his ass and staring into space.

I Weep For the Future,


~ by Woeful on July 18, 2009.

13 Responses to “Welcome To The Vomitorium”

  1. why don’t “work experience” kids choose to try out a job they really want to do?

  2. No vomit for us this week, but we did have blood, urine, and broken water. Two calls to the police, one ambulance. And tomorrow I go back for my 6th day in a row.

    Tony sounds like a real prize.

  3. sounds like me 🙂

  4. Seems to me like the better experience for this kid would be being homeless. Let him see what it’s like to only have the clothes on your back to wear. To sleep outside. To have the choices between begging for money and prostituting yourself for money.

    Hey, five months of being on the streets convinced my oldest brother to get off drugs. And nearly two years of it got my other brother to give up booze. So maybe a night or two sleeping in a cardboard box will convince the kid that work isn’t so bad.

    • We had one of those lazy teen volunteers this summer, who I was tasked to give duties to this summer. He preferred to try and sneak off and play on the computers instead of the very easy and mild duties I gave him. I read him the riot act and told him he had one more chance. He persisted in trying to slack off as much as possible. So I told him to leave and not come back. Wow, that felt good. Too bad this one had to do volunteer work for some HS requirement. Hope he manages to find something else to do…

  5. This kid goes way beyond the normal teen level of apathy. He is equally disinterested in every task, whether it involves sitting, standing, moving, inside, outside… You name it. I’ve never seen anything like it and commented to my colleagues wondering what he does for fun in his spare time since he doesn’t like anything. One of them then commented that he collects cents… LOL!

  6. More like collects dust.

    Telling you, one night homeless, should cure him. When he finds out the only way to survive is to dig through trash or turn tricks he’d be happy to do library work.

  7. Tony is probably lazy as hell, but he is also very obviously mentally ill. Have you talked to whoever graced you with him about it?

  8. I would seriously want to wring his lazy little neck. I get kids like this in my program from time to time, and yes, it makes the future look dismal indeed. I just can’t think about it very much.

  9. I agree with amyro. While I’m sure he’s incredibly frustrating, that kind of complete uninterest in anything suggests a depressive disorder. I’d mention it to whoever coordinates the work experience program.

  10. If you don’t want to work here you don’t have to…but then you’ll have to go home.

    As for vomit…try clumping cat litter…it works wonders. We keep a box and a plastic cup in our custodial closet.

  11. Save all the money you can. He is the reason there will be nothing left in the Federal coffers when you need it.

    If you do want to continue to see Tony that is easy. Get a job as a corrections officer. He’ll be there.

  12. I’ve been lucky – most of my teen volunteers have been great. I did have one who was there for “naughty” community service, and he was stupid, vapid, surly, and useless, and his mother made all the arrangements for him (even though he was old enough to do it by himself) around his “lacrosse schedule,” (even though he should not be participating in fun – and especially not to the exclusion of his community service – if he is stupid enough to get in trouble with the cops). But, that right there is why we have the problems we do – parents today are NOT parenting.

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