Froot Loop & Grandpa

Where the hell do I begin with this travesty?


Froot Loop, the woman who a while back I thought was a likely contender to be my next stalker paid us a visit today for the first time in a long while. She was irate. She told me that she was suing the City. She needed a computer to access her case files on the State’s judicial website. Fine.

However, since the last time she was in we’ve changed over to a fully-automated computer reservation system that needs some kind of ID for access to use as a password. She didn’t take this lightly. She insisted that she use the computer she used that last time. I informed her that that computer doesn’t exist anymore, and around and around we went. Still Froot Loop insisted that she use that specific computer because it worked for her in the past or another computer that is soley allocated for the unemployed who are seeking jobs.  I told her over and over that she couldn’t have either of the computers that she desired.

Finally she relented and asked to be signed onto a computer that she could actually use. I asked her for an ID and she would only agree to read me the number off the thing, not let me see it. Fine. So I input the number and sent her on her way fully knowing that my plight would not end there. Only a few short minuted later she was back complaining that she couldn’t logon.

[at this moment I am praying for death]

I go over to her workstation and type the number into the computer and it instantly allows access… How about that! Could it be that Froot Loop is crazier than a shit house rat? I think this likely. Anyway, no sooner does the browser come up than she began telling me that I need to guide her to the State’s judicial website so she can do whatever crazy shit house rats do there… I complied

Once there she types in her case number and… Nothing happens. Somehow this is the Library’s fault, or the computer’s fault, after all this isn’t the computer that works! At that moment she becomes livid and tells me that she needs to access her crazy shit because she will be meeting with the judge, but before that she needs to meet with her priest!

[blink] Fine, I think sure, meet with the Pope, I really don’t give a fuck just leave me and all the other non-lunatics in peace… She complained that it must be the computer that she was on and I insisted that it appeared to be a server-side issue. She was not happy and demands another computer…

Fine, so I make another reservation for the only computer available which is in the Childrens’ Department. Not ten minutes go by and I see her again. She tells me that she can’t access her case on that computer either (I am Jack’s complete lack of surprise). She then demanded that I write a letter stating that the judicial website appeared to be broken. Fine, but luckily I was not the supervisor in charge today, luckily for me, the Assistant Director just happened to be in. So I led Froot Loop Over the the AD and explained her plight. The AD told her that she would write her a letter straight away on official letterhead and everything. This seemed to satiate Froot Loop for the time being but she reiterated that she couldn’t wait for it because she had to meet with her priest… Fine. The Assistant Director assured her that the letter would be awaiting her pickup at a later time. Now, the AD and I looked at each other like… “This is one crazy shit house rat we’re dealing with isn’t it?” And straight away Froot Loop left.

Thank the Maker!

She did come back later to pick up the letter and left without further incident but shortly thereafter an old man walked up to the Reference Desk, he seemed ancient and someone got him a chair so that he could sit down while he explained what he needed to my colleague. At the time I was toiling away with another project in the office but I noticed that she was with him for like 20min. Then he left to log onto a computer…

After he left I asked my coworker about the transaction and she told me that he needed a card but he was so old that she personally went to the Circulation Desk and actually registered him in the system issuing him a card while he waited in his chair at Reference. She discovered that he is from Alaska and comes into the Northeast often and it takes him four days to drive through Canada, but now he needs a passport for the trip and he never needed one before. This bummed the old guy out but he was going to be around the area until August so it was nothing to get bent about.

All was going well from that point on but a while later he hit a snag online and asked my coworker to come over to help him through his problem. When she came back she laughed, and told me that grandpa was stuck in our State until August because of a DUI and the subsequent date of his court appearance.

I nearly shit myself at that point… It was time to put the day to rest. And we did, and it was good!


~ by Woeful on May 9, 2009.

4 Responses to “Froot Loop & Grandpa”

  1. “I am Jack’s complete lack of surprise” is so appropriate!

  2. Jeez…sound like you need a vacation…

  3. sounds like you’re working at the gimcrack

  4. Vacation can’t come soon enough….

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