Freakuary

This Image Sums Up My Entire Day

bottle_can

Without a doubt today had the highest nut to normal ratio of any day I have ever worked… And I’ve worked some really freaky days in my time as a librarian. Due to the PTSD factor involved I don’t care to relive any of it here. Suffice it to say that at one point or another I had to call the police, the fire department and EMS.

Although not featured players in the day’s events, both Special Ed and Porn Man made cameos, but Space Ace was curiously absent probably because he was busy fighting off the alien invasion… Actually, after the things I witnessed today I’m thinkig that the Library might just be ground zero.

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~ by Woeful on January 31, 2009.

16 Responses to “Freakuary”

  1. Oh you can’t tease us with work misery and not give us one story from the day. Pretty Please with throw out customers at closing on top. On the upside there is no pee or feces visible in that picture.

  2. I just need some space… Maybe tomorrow I’ll elaborate at length here in the comments. Maybe.

  3. Drinking in the bathroom… sometimes necessary.

  4. Oh no! Poor Woe.

  5. Hi Emma: I’d say drinking wine, or anything actually, in the bathroom is a bad sign.

    Thanks Max.

  6. I’m with Doret. Will be checking back for an update once you’ve had a sleep and a calming glass of single malt

  7. OK, I’m still not mentally ready to write any entertaining prose so I’m going to lay out my day yesterday in list form:

    Just as the day began I had to call the cops because a woman who looks a hulluva lot like someone they have an APB out on enters the building. As it turned out it wasn’t her.

    A horde of homeless people, many of whom we’ve never seen before, immediately began wandering around the building until they eventually found comfy places to fall asleep so we were forced to keep waking them up all day long.

    A woman decides to do some (what should be library) housekeeping and falls off a chair possibly breaking a rib or two led to the Fire Department & EMS being called. CCTV should show that she’s a liar but that’s neither here nor there. As they were wheeling her away on the gurney she was cheerful and waving bye to us.

    A random woman found her way to the staff only side of the Circulation Desk to route through items the staff didn’t have time to reshelve.

    A guy who only 15 minutes before closing tried the same end run around Circulation (the guy had crazy hair and a beer belly with his shirt only halfway tucked in), but I was heading the other way and stood blocking his path asking him, “How may I help you?” To which he responded that he just wanted to look at the card catalog and pointed to what technically is a card catalog but is now almost only universally used by libraries to store the personal information of all their patrons. I informed the guy that that was NOT a card catalog and directed him to our online catalogs.

    Lastly, right at closing time a young guy in the process of checking out his DVDs seemed stymied by our date due cards. He then proceeded to complain that the name “Gaylord” on the cards could be considered offensive. WTF? So it was explained to this dumbass that the Gaylord Company manufactures the date due cards that we use. He was complaining about their damn trademark!

    Factor in the “normal” freakish baseline of the place with Special Ed, and Porn Man, and a few of our other Irregulars and I had it. I’ve never been so glad to leave – Check please!

  8. It’s weird how I get this ominous feeling sitting at work and just know deep down “Oh crap, today’s gonna be a lousy day”.
    Looks like you had 10 of them in the space of a single day.

  9. Guess there’s never a dull moment at your library. Makes me appreciate my small, peaceful, rural library all the more.

  10. Did anyone see you carry a camera into the restroom? Because that could be misinterpreted.

  11. LOL… The camera, er… “phone” was in my pants.

  12. “The camera, er… “phone” was in my pants.”

    Sure, sure, that is what all the library boys say.

  13. I keep it on (((vibrate))) so I don’t disturb anyone… And every time someone posts a comment it always brings a smile to my face.

  14. Wait – where exactly in your pants do you keep that phone?

    On second though, I don’t think I want to know.

  15. Oh, woe, what a cracker of a day.
    I’m so glad we don’t get to see APBs in our libraries: some of the staff would never be off the ‘phone!

  16. You mean to tell me you DONT drink while in the jon?

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